No, I don't have just a job, I have a career. A career that for over nine years has allowed me to mostly work in assignments that were considered hard, elite, or just plain cool. A career that has paid well--nay, extremely well.
I have a career that I love most days. Granted, it's in vogue to gripe about work. Just peek at any Facebook page and you'll see moaning and groaning status updates about work, going to work and being at work. I've even participated from time to time. But random gripes aside, I love my work.
I have a stable career, and I should be ever so grateful that unlike so many others, I don't have to worry about pink slips, unemployment lines, or pinching pennies to the point that my family's quality of life suffers.
I have a career which I really truly believe allows me to make a difference in the lives of others.
I have a career in which I am a contributing member of my family financially. All things being equal, I match my husband's paycheck dollar for dollar.
I should be so damn grateful and proud.
And yet...
Yet I find myself longing to make but mere pennies or work in an occupation where I was completely expendable. I find myself longing for that simply so that I could justify quitting and staying at home with Jeremy and Emma. So many friends and family seem to be doing the SAHM thing that I wonder more and more, "If they can do it, why can't I?"
Unfortunately, it just is not in the cards. I am currently contributing half of our total income. Plus--I think there is something about showing Jeremy and Emma how Mommy and Daddy work for everything they have, and work damn hard at that. I know that they won't grow up any worse for the wear just because we happen to be a dual income family. And I hope that Jeremy and Emma will make smarter decisions as they grow up knowing that both Mommy and Daddy work careers that require honesty, integrity, dedication, a modicum of personal sacrifice and sense of selflessness.
There's also the pride knowing that Jeremy is already learning what Mommy and Daddy do for a living, and he finds it worthy of his admiration and therefore imitation.
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| First lesson, commandeering vehicles. |
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| Second lesson, starting a black and white. |
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| Third lesson, plain clothes investigations and interrogations. |
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| Interrogating Brobee. |
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And yet still, here I am looking over the fence at the green green grass.
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